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Updated: Apr 20, 2022

Tough one isn’t it.

You want to feel like you know what you are doing.

You know confidence comes with knowledge.

You know there are things you need to learn and things to expect as a new mum.


When the time comes and your baby is here, your baby isn’t doing the book said they would be doing.



When this happens, what do you do next?

Apart from swear under your breath that is!

Here is a list of handy hints:

  • First up, know that books are written generally for babies… Babies are different. You are different. The situation differs. (See handy hint below for reading books)

  • Look at your baby. Take a moment to actually look at what your baby is doing. The cries. The movements. What are they trying to let you know? Go on the info available to you.

  • Get familiar with their cues and body movements *** you will get to know their personalities, cries in the early weeks***

  • Run with your fabulous in-built instincts, what are they saying? Instincts are something that's hard to explain. It's a feeling. The first thought. A feeling in your gut. I believe, in motherhood instincts are really useful to tune into. They can get lost in the tired fog and endless info however, the more we listen to them, the more we feel confident of choices. They act as our guiding light.

  • Don’t worry if things need a ‘tweak’… it’s a teaching for the next time you do the same thing.

  • Find a person/source who you feel is on your page for guidance

  • Know that babies are randoms in the early weeks so probably best not to expect them to follow (or know) when they need to eat, sleep and play.

  • You may have strong opinions around you, and support is great but if their ideas aren’t how you feel you want to do things, you will struggle using their approach – it goes back to instincts. Stand by how you want to do things. That’s OK. Choose a route and if it's not the right one, that’s OK, you learn your own way of what to do next time.

If your baby is unsettled and you would like to know techniques to help settle them, or in fact, if your baby is due and you want to feel more confident to know what to do; grab your how-to’s here

I know with my first son that I read LOADS. Books. Articles. Social Media. Which is all good but I did feel confused. A pull between the books, my instincts, and what people around me were saying what I should be doing. Not to mention I wasn’t thinking with clarity because of the lack of zzzzzzz’s. With books & articles, take in what makes sense to you, what feels instinctively right, and leave the rest. Not everything is going to work for you.

I’ll leave you with, do what feels right.

Find out your way.

Write your own book of doing things.

If you would like to chat about postnatal support, either if you are heading towards it or in it right now, click this link to book a short call with me:

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