Smiling to keep the frog away.
Like lots of things there is focus on getting started and up and running, and not so much about when things come to an end. How to end well and how you are going to feel.
And this is certainly true when you finish working with a family you have supported postnatally.
Whether the support needed was emotional back-up or more hands-on help, there is always emotion when the support comes to an end.
The aim of the game for the work I do is for mum not to need me anymore because she is feeling differently. Confidence has grown. Self-belief blossomed. Fog has lifted and she feels she has turned her corner moving onto the next phase.
Sometimes I meet mums-to-be, which is ideal as we can begin to build the relationship, find out about the family dynamic and work on planning and prep for the when the baby is here.
If you would like to read more on prep and planning for the baby whilst you are pregnant, click on the link to get a copy sent to you:
Of course, there are families I met when baby is home and it’s then they realise they would like help. Mum's like help for different reasons, some of which are listed here:
https://www.aprilknell.com/about
Either way you grow a strong connection to mum and the family. You are privileged to be part of their special time with a new baby home. You are willing mum to feel her best and you want to do your absolute best for her.
It's one of the reasons why I always meet expectant mum/new mum to make sure we get on. It's a close space and emotions are heightened. We have to make sure there is the chemistry.
I am sure I am not the only one but I have quite a strong emotional reaction to most goodbyes. Frog in the throat type stuff. When I say goodbye for the last time I am often smiling hard to keep the frog away, especially if there has been a really strong connection between the mum, and the little ones, and I.
Sometimes I am lucky enough to see the baby’s again when they are bigger and new milestones have been reached. It’s a beautiful thing.
Each one of those beautiful babies have a lifetime of opportunity ahead of them. Go take on the world little ones! xx